By Paul Reinhardt
On Tuesday, Sept. 1, the New Canaan Parent Support Group will hold its 10th Annual Community Addiction Awareness Vigil in downtown New Canaan, a decade after a small group of us first gathered to say out loud what too many families carry in silence.
I started the parent support group after losing my son, wanting to do something in his memory in my own community. Others who believed in the idea soon joined, and together we created the Vigil. The framework we built that first year still guides us, though over 10 years we have leaned further into one message: recovery is possible.
This year’s evening begins with live music at 6 p.m. and the formal program at 7 p.m. at 6 South Avenue. John Hamilton, CEO of Liberation Programs, will emcee. Three community members in long-term recovery, Andrew, Maggie and Mike, will share their stories, and two local clergy, Martha Epstein and Maryanne Baker, will co-lead the candlelight ceremony. The Musical Intervention Recovery band, led by Adam Christoferson, will perform, and a Hope and Remembrance Wall will honor those who died too soon.
If your picture of what the Vigil is like is a grim one, our event may surprise you. Look around and you will see a high-school student standing beside someone marking a decade in recovery, a worried parent beside a neighbor who simply wants a more vibrant town. For one evening, the many threads of our community are woven into a tapestry, and up close, recovery is active, hopeful and full of connection.
What’s clear to everyone present, based on both the speakers and attendees in recovery, is that there are multiple pathways of recovery. Music, outdoor adventure, wellness, IOPs, and 12-step fellowship are just a few examples. People walking many paths will be among us on Sept. 1, proof that communities like New Canaan care and that no one walks the road back alone.
Those who come put it best. “To me, this event is about a community of people coming together to support each other, and to empower one another to reach out during times of difficulty,” said Mary Weiss. For parents, the stakes are personal. “I am a parent who could have lost my son,” said Wendy Lang. “By God’s grace, he is still here.”
We will also welcome back Kera, who spoke at our very first Vigil nine years ago. Now more than 12 years in recovery, married and raising two sons, she returns as living proof of that promise.
We close as we have since the first year, reciting a Community Pledge together:
I will reach out to someone I know is struggling.
I will let them know I am thinking of them.
I will tell them I am available to talk.
I will take the initiative and not wait for them to come to me.
I will listen to their story.
I will offer words of support and hope for their future.
Last year more than 600 people attended. The Vigil is co-hosted by the New Canaan Community Foundation, with support from the Town of New Canaan, New Canaan CARES, Silver Hill Hospital, The Lighthouse CT and others.
Addiction thrives in silence and shame. When we speak out and share our stories, we break that cycle. This year we expect 750 people, and we hope you will be one of them.
If you have never come, let this be the year. Bring someone: a friend, a family member, your son or daughter, and, if you are so inclined, wear orange in support. It is hard to put into words the depth of feeling, or the sense of embrace, that one evening can hold. Come see for yourself and think about who you are going for.
Guests are invited to reserve a candle at ncparentsupportgroup.org/annual-addiction-awareness-vigil.
Paul Reinhardt is the Founder of the New Canaan Parent Support Group.
