By John J. Kriz
God’s Acre is arguably the heart of New Canaan – an integral part of the town’s precious historic district, graced with three houses of worship, important antique buildings and a memorial to our veterans.
But New Canaan’s centers of faith extend beyond there, and include not only the Roman Catholic, Methodist, Presbyterian, Episcopal, Lutheran, Christian Science, Mormon and Baptist churches, but also worship services held in Saxe Middle School by Trinity Church, and in New Canaan High School by Grace Community Church.
And last, but very much not least, is Chabad New Canaan (www.newcanaanjewish.org), led for fifteen years by Rabbi Levi Mendelow, in partnership with his wife Michal – an increasingly active fulcrum for Jewish education, worship and community.
Rabbi Mendelow
Born and raised in Johannesburg, South Africa, Rabbi Mendelow’s parents became more observant during college, eventually meeting and marrying, and becoming affiliated with the Lubavitch, or Chabad, branch of orthodox Judaism. In 1998 Rabbi Mendelow came to the United States to study in various rabbinical schools, where he met his American-born wife, marrying in 2003. Today they are the parents of seven children, with ages ranging from two to twenty.
“I didn’t always know I’d be a rabbi,” recalls Rabbi Mendelow. “I did want to study Judaism in depth after high school. So I went to rabbinical schools to study. I didn’t even know if I would complete the course and become a rabbi.” However, as he was studying “I was fascinated, and intrigued, and was inspired to share the knowledge that I had with others.”
Rabbi Mendelow traveled extensively during rabbinical school, visiting every country in Central America, as well as Russia, Korea, Japan and Vietnam, calling on often-isolated Jewish communities who were seeking ways to stay connected to their faith. “People in remote places don’t necessarily have access to resources,” he observes, going on to note that gaining an understanding of Jewish traditions and theology is very important for the Jewish people. These meetings with worldwide Jewry helped inspire Rabbi Mendelow to make it his “mission in the world to make sure that every Jew everywhere should have access to Jewish education and Jewish opportunities.”
After his ordination, the Rabbi and wife Michal moved to Connecticut in 2004, starting in Stamford where they both worked at the Chabad center there on adult education, children’s programming and a preschool. “And then about five years later we became aware that there was a growing Jewish community in New Canaan — still very small but growing,” remembers Rabbi Mendelow. “And the idea came to start a Chabad in New Canaan, to move to New Canaan and start doing services for the local Jewish community. Which is what we did.”
Lubavitch/Chabad
In the 1700s a rabbi named Israel ben Eliezer, who lived in what is now Ukraine, founded the Hasidic movement within Judaism, a religious movement emphasizing mysticism, strict devotion to Jewish law, and a close relationship with God. Over time, various branches of Hasidism emerged, often based on geography. One of those branches was the Lubavitch group, founded in the late 1700s by Rebbe (or Rabbi, the term ‘Rebbe’ being reserved for the group’s leader) Shneur Zalman. The second leader was Rebbe Dovber Shneuri, who moved the group’s center to the town of Lubavitch, which is now in Russia near the border with Belarus.
The Lubavitch Hasidic group is also known as the Chabad. This word is an acronym of the Hebrew words “Chochmah” (wisdom), “Binah” (understanding) and “Da’at” (knowledge). These three concepts represent the core philosophical foundations of the group. The words Lubavitch and Chabad are often used interchangeably.
At the beginning of the Holocaust the sixth Chabad Rebbe and many congregants left Europe for the United States, with leadership eventually falling to Rebbe Menachem Mendel Schneerson, with the Chabad’s global headquarters now being established in Crown Heights, Brooklyn. Since the 1994 passing of the Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem M. Schneerson, the Chabad-Lubavitch has grown exponentially. The network of Chabad institutions continues to be run by the leadership infrastructure that the Rebbe established. Unlike some other Hasidic groups, the Chabad is dedicated to assertive outreach to Jewish communities globally, large or small, the goal being to bring Jewish knowledge and community to all regardless of how they define their level of observance or Jewish identity.
There are around two dozen distinct Chabad centers in Connecticut, New Canaan being one. Each Chabad is separately incorporated as a religious community, and is supported by local contributions, which stay in the local community. Rabbi Mendelow is in regular contact with Chabad centers, as well as synagogues, in the area.
New Canaan resident and former town elected official Pavla Levin, who was born and raised in the Soviet Union, recalls fondly outreach from local Chabad rabbis during times of Soviet repression of Jewish life. The Chabad was “a very much underground type situation,” and “the rabbis — they risked their lives to teach kids Torah and to give us Jewish education.”
Being New Canaan’s Rabbi
“The ultimate goal is to provide local resources for people,” stresses Rabbi Mendelow, those resources being “the opportunity for people to study and practice Judaism in the community.”
Rabbi Mendelow does not do this alone. He regularly emphasizes that he and his wife Michal, who has teacher training as well as extensive theological education, are very much a partnership, running New Canaan’s Chabad center as a team.
New Canaan town treasurer and Chabad congregant Andrew Brooks concurs, saying “she (Michal) is incredibly involved,” and that “it really is a team effort.” Michal Mendelow is very active with social and community-building efforts, with Mr. Brooks noting that “he and his wife have always established a wonderful service at the end of (the)… fasting period [after Yom Kippur], and with a spread of food and a social gathering afterwards for people to mingle, reflect on the year ahead.”
Ms. Levin agrees, noting that Michal Mendelow teaches Sunday School, where children “learn about Judaism and Torah traditions and all sorts of great stuff.”
Says Rabbi Mendelow, “Before we moved to New Canaan, there was no local synagogue group doing this kind of thing, so if anyone wanted to do anything, they really had to travel to Stamford or Norwalk or another place. Now the goal is to provide something local.”
Have things changed over the years? “The answer is – absolutely it’s changed. It’s changed because the community has grown. When we moved here we knew a handful of people. Now we’re connected with many more, so the services have grown, and the people joining and the programming and everything has grown in all kinds of ways.”
Ms. Levin notes that the congregation “certainly has come into its own. There are a lot more congregants.” In addition, “there are a lot more children that are involved. The services are getting quite a bit younger, which is great to see.” Mr. Brooks concurs, stressing that Rabbi Mendelow’s efforts have continued to gain traction. “I definitely am seeing more people involved today than when he first came to New Canaan. I think a part of that has been both just the work that he has done to reach out to New Canaan Jews and let them know that they have a home here, that they can come to local services.”
What sort of services are held? It varies. Sabbath services might not be held every week, depending on demand. But holiday observances such as Yom Kippur, Shavuot and Purim are emphasized, and the gathering on God’s Acre for the lighting of the Menorah during Hanukkah is the major Jewish community event. “It’s very special. It means a lot that here in America we can openly and publicly celebrate our Judaism without persecution. That’s always a wonderful thing.”
And then there is the personal touch. Mr. Brooks recalls fondly Rabbi Mendelow, Michal and family driving around town, dropping off menorahs, gift bags and Hanukkah ‘gelt’ to congregants’ homes. Ms. Levin notes that Rabbi Mendelow “prepared our kids for their bar mitzvahs.” Furthermore, after the October 7 attack in southern Israel, the Rabbi collected donations of physical items needed by those directly affected from the congregation as well as the wider community. Members of Chabad centers delivered them.
Much of Rabbi Mendelow’s and Michal Mendelow’s time is devoted to education – adult and children – on topics ranging from Jewish history to the Talmud. Events can be held in numerous places: The Rabbi’s home, the Nature Center, Waveny House, the Library or the YMCA.
As is common with clergy, Rabbi Mendelow is also called on to provide spiritual support to his congregation on matters including grieving after loss of a loved one, family problems, emotional distress and even addiction. Recalls Ms. Levin, “he was helping out my husband when he was dealing with the illness of his mother and when she also passed away. So he has seen us through all sorts of family [issues]: the good, the bad, whatever happens.” Rabbi Mendelow even organized a minyan (group of ten Jewish men) to offer special prayers. The rabbi is periodically called on by Silver Hill Hospital if a patient specifically requests Jewish clergy for support, and he visits Waveny Life Care on holidays and when called upon.
One thing that has particularly impressed Mr. Brooks about Rabbi Mendelow is that “he’s developed a really tight-knit, welcoming community.” In addition, “he welcomes everyone from all walks of life. Doesn’t matter how religious you are.” Concludes Mr. Brooks, “he has this contagious personality that just makes you feel special.” Says Ms. Levin, the rabbi and his family are “welcoming to all,” and that “we want you just the way you are.”
“At the end of the day,” concludes Rabbi Mendelow, “it’s a question of what the community’s looking for, and we try to serve people where they’re at.”
New Canaan Life
“New Canaan is really a special community. The people here are very friendly,” he tells the New Canaan Sentinel, during which time someone stops by to say hello. “You see, we know a lot of people. Everybody’s warm, everybody’s friendly. It’s a community. It’s a lovely town. The Jewish community has been very receptive. The non-Jewish community has been very welcoming and friendly. It’s been beautiful to be in New Canaan. And one of the things that’s really special is how the community has responded to what we are doing, by engaging and participating. It’s a very special thing.”
As well, “one of the things that’s really been beautiful is to see how we’ve been able to facilitate friendships — people meet at the Chabad, and wonderful and beautiful friendships have risen from members of the community amongst themselves. And it’s really special to see. Community is very special to us.” A few years ago someone donated a new Torah scroll to the community, which was a particularly joyous occasion.
Challenges? “Especially in the beginning when we were first here, we didn’t know as many people and so we would’ve liked to have had more participation, but it wasn’t really realistic. It took time to build things up. Even now … I would love to have services every week, but it’s not yet something…people are looking for in the community. It’s a challenge to compete with all the other interests that people have, which is understandable. I think that probably all religious groups have to compete in the world for participation.”
Rabbi Mendelow goes on to remark that another challenge “is providing engaging programming that people want to participate in. And the wonderful thing is that people do participate. As I mentioned before, the funding comes from within the community. So fundraising is always a challenge because we’re not getting supported by outside groups. So fundraising is a challenge.”
What’s Next?
Before getting there one must deal with ‘What Now?’ Getting children to school. Morning prayers. Administration. A hospital visit. Preparing for holy days. Teaching a class. Teaching another class. Visiting with children’s parents. Preparing for Sabbath. Fundraising. Being a rabbi means you’re constantly busy and keep odd hours.
It seems ‘What’s Next?’ is ‘More of Everything’. “We’re not going anywhere else. This is where we are. We’re here to stay. Generally speaking, in the Chabad community, you move to a community with a one-way ticket, you go there to stay and one spends one’s life in that community.” Stresses Rabbi Mendelow, “We’re absolutely committed to New Canaan,” and to deepening and broadening the outreach to the town’s Jewish residents to further build their Jewish knowledge and sense of community.
“We’ve been here for 15 years,” he concludes. “And we have tremendous gratitude to the community for embracing us, welcoming us, supporting the Chabad because it’s really a testimony to the fact that it’s a wonderful community. The Jewish community — the general community in New Canaan — is really a very special community. We’ve only had the most wonderful interactions with Jews and non-Jews in the community.”
‘Next Station’
New Canaan’s tag line is ‘Next Station to Heaven’ – a particularly apropos phrase in an article on a clergyman and his congregation. But keeping that tag line fresh means work, and the hard, but obviously gratifying, work that Rabbi Levi Mendelow and Michal Mendelow perform daily are certainly supportive.
“May the Children of the Stock of Abraham, who dwell in this land, continue to merit and enjoy the good will of the other Inhabitants; while every one shall sit in safety under his own vine and figtree, and there shall be none to make him afraid. May the father of all mercies scatter light and not darkness in our paths, and make us all in our several vocations useful here, and in his own due time and way everlastingly happy.”
From the letter written by George Washington to the Hebrew Congregation in Newport, Rhode Island, 1790.
John J Kriz is a 30+ year resident of New Canaan. Opinions expressed are his own.
